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Price of Life: Chapter IX

Paradise and Oblivion

Part III

"We are the Dead. Short days ago...

We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,

Loved and were loved and now we lie,

And now we lie, In Flander's Fields..."

• In Flander's Fields, John McCrae

The life of a soldier can be glorious, even if he should die for the cause he embodies. But I didn't die for the war nor do I lie in some cemetery with an unmarked cross. But we did live, we felt dawn, we saw sunsets glow. We loved and were loved, but instead someone else lies in a grave that was meant for me. Does that mean that our lives were any less glorious?

When John McCrae wrote this poem, it was because his friend was killed in combat during The Great War. I never fought in any war, but I find I can still relate to his loss. I'm pretty sure after he saw his comrade perish he never looked at a cemetery the same way again. The same goes for me. When you see a gravestone, you know that its there to show that someone is buried in the ground beneath. But it doesn't really tell you anything about who is buried there. It doesn't tell you what that person liked to do or what they looked like. It doesn't tell you what kind of music they listened to or what their favorite food was. It seems like as soon as that person died, that person's life came down to two dates; Birth and Death. Now, I always look at gravestones and try to wonder what the faithfully departed were like. I don't see a stone sunken into the earth, I see people, people with names and faces. Just because these people are no longer with us, it does not mean that the sunsets they saw glow can be forgotten or the love they harbored fade away. It cost me dearly to come to that realization.

My visits to Rachel's house continued for the next few weeks, each time falling deeper and deeper in love with her. To my surprise, she was actually very enthusiastic about my plans. We both eventually agreed that we would make a cute couple. We talked about marriage a lot. We weren't ready, but I think we both knew that it was inevitable. I wanted to spend my future with her and she wanted to spend her future with me.

While our talks went on, her father said nothing. He never said a word to me after my last visit. I assumed it was nothing and blamed it on senility. It must've been hard to see his daughter make marriage arrangements, never mind make them with a human.

Then, doomsday.

I accepted the promotion. I did it so that when Rachel and I did get married and decide to have young, we'd be financially secure. I did NOT do it because I liked my commander or his sick ideologies. He was very glad to have me accept his proposal, however.

When the base was assembled at formation Friday morning, I was presented with the rank of Captain. I felt a sense of accomplishment. I was now one of the elite. The applause and glory came with a price, however.

Now that I was one of the high-status officers on the base, I had a fair share in managing base affairs before we shipped of for the capital. I took an active role in meetings, got a better office and I stopped having to watch my men take charge of the front gate.

That last part I could've stuck with. Sure it was boring, but it was nice. Nice compared to my new job, that is. As a newly ordained Captain, I now had a much larger unit. The men in this unit were a lot more rugged than the guys at the gate. They all talked like sailors for one, profanities made up more than half of their vocabularies. Also, they carried different affects than my previous unit had. All of them carried truncheons and batons, never mind just rifles.

You guessed it; I was now the head of the slave-labor enforcement squad. Now, that job may seem to be high and mighty, but trust me, it wasn't. I got a chance to see how badly these creatures suffered. I had never even seen the mines prior to my transfer to XX-31.

It was pretty brutal. I watch high up on a catwalk while my men below cracked whips and beat the disobedient. Women and children would look up at me with fearful eyes, as if I was god and I had chosen to punish them. I will never forget those stares. They are forever burned into my mind. I see them when I sleep.

I was never totally fond of the idea of slavery but then again I never spoke out against it either. Something Virgil failed to bring up about the Nazis is during the Nuremburg Trials, Nazi leaders pleaded innocent on the grounds that they were "just following orders" during the holocaust. They hung from the neck for that. It was no excuse. I am no better than those Nazi scum, because I didn't do anything about what I thought was wrong. I claimed that it was the natural order of things and did what I was told. I paid the price for insolence, a heavy toll that still haunts me to this day.

When the work day ended, I was eager to get my mind off my work and go see Rachel. Taking my newly acquired company car, I set off toward Maxim. Its funny how driving down a road one way can be so different from driving down the other. I was speeding off toward the city to see my beloved, only to find tragedy.

I got to Rachel's house and I planned on showing off my new Captain's insignia to her. I could just see the look on her face. In fact, I had a ring in my pocket. I was planning on proposing to celebrate.

I knocked on the door and I heard someone quickly scramble to the door. I assumed it was Rachel in her excitement to see me. But I was wrong. Mr. Axelridge threw the door opens angrily and looked at me as if I had three heads. Taking his cane, he swung at my head. I ducked, but it just nearly missed. I stumbled off the porch and stood on the sidewalk. "What the hell are you doing?"

The man took another swing, "Don't play dumb, boy!"

"What are you talking about? What's going on?"

"You've already taken everything from me, what more do you want?"

I couldn't comprehend what the old fox was saying. He swung at me again, this time it caught me by the jaw. I fell over and landed on my ass. When I looked up, he was holding the cane above his head, ready to hit me again. I put my hands up in surrender, not wishing to fight my soon-to-be father-in-law.

"I should've known that you were trouble from the first day I saw you. Fucking military! You knew I couldn't pay you back that money, so you just had to take it out on my only child!"

I was agape. Something had happened to Rachel? I wasn't angry with him anymore; I was more concerned with what Rachel had to do with all this. "Wait, Mr. Axelridge, I have no idea what you're talking about! Please, tell me what's going on!"

He looked at me as if I were an ant fit to be stepped upon. "Don't be an idiot, boy. You know that I owed money to your commander. But because I can't give the Nazi fuck his money back right now, he had my daughter taken away!"

I almost shat myself right there. Lieutenant Colonel Virgil was involved in this? Rachel had been kidnapped? My mind raced, not just from the blow I took to the face, but from the complexity of the whole situation.

"Rachel's gone? When did this happen?"

"This morning. They came in and took her while she was sleeping. Virgil personally came to collect his money. He put a cigarette out in my eye. See?"

It was true; his eye had been severely burned. He showed no pain, however, it was drowned out by his anger at me and my commander. "Mr. Axelridge, I'm sorry, I had no idea."

"Sorry? My daughter is probably being raped right now! I lost an eye! My life is forever broken and you're sorry? Oh no, my boy, you're not sorry. You have no idea what this feels like! He groped my daughter with his filthy hands and made me watch! Do you know what it feels like that have someone dear suffer and you have to live with the pain?"

I didn't know it at the time, but I was going to learn how it felt very soon.

He waved his cane at my car, "Get the fuck out of here; I don't want to see you're fucking face anymore."

My head was spinning from the beating and the adrenaline that pumped in my veins only made my thoughts cloudier. I got into my car and drove back to XX-31 as fast as the car would go. I had never driven drunk before, but if I had, I imagine that it would feel a lot like that would. My heart boomed and my temples hurt. Blood was running from my lip where I had been struck. It only drove me to go faster. My insides boiled with hate for Virgil and worry for Rachel.

My body was running on autopilot. My thoughts became unclear and irrational. My head hurt like hell from the beating I had just endured and my vision was going bad. I could barely stay on the road, struggling to keep the blood under control and keep the car on track as best I could. Like I said, driving down the road in the opposite direction couldn't have felt any more different than the road I had just driven up a few minutes prior.

My mind was exploding with thoughts. Was Rachel safe? Was Virgil hurting her? Will I be able to fix this somehow? The last thought that ran through my conscience was, "What am I going to do with Virgil once I find him?" I was angrier than I had ever been in my entire life, as I had the metal to back it up. My revolver was at my hip.

I practically ran the gate down, not bothering to show my pass or ID for the guard. I drove along the road with dangerous speed, making soldiers dart off the thoroughfare in panic. Angrily, I parked the car sloppily in the parking lot. I don't think I even took the time to shut the engine off. I proceeded inside and made my way to the elevator leading to the mines. When two guards saluted me on my way there, I shoved them both out of my way. I had no time for formalities; a loved one was on the line.

I entered the elevator and hit the button for the bottom floor, the section of the mines where all the tunnels met. That's where the primary activity was housed. The women and children were posted near the cargo elevators so that the men could be used for the separation of the gold from the rock. It was a long ride from the observation platform down to the bottom. It was the longest moment of my life.

Finally, the doors parted and I stepped out onto the mine shaft floor. I could hear axes strike rock and men groan with the weight of the ore. Whips could be heard cracking and the occasional pistol reported a sharp blast to keep the slaves under pressure. It was hell, it really was.

I began to look among the lines of women and children, searching for my vixen. I was sure she was here. Call it stupidity; call it a lover's intuition. The slaves looked scared as I approached and I don't blame them. I was a human, I wore a Captain's uniform and I had an irate look on my face.

Amid the gun reports and the whir of chainsaw blades, I could hear someone shouting.

"Bitch! You'll do as you're told!"

I spun round, trying to locate the source of such a outburst. That simple motion seemed to take an eternity to complete. And what I saw when my head had come full circle made my heart burst.

"I said do as you're told'! Now get up you filthy whore!"

One of my men was whipping Rachel.

I broke into a stride. Time began to crawl, like one of those slow-downs you see in shootout scenes where you can see guys diving through the air and bullets moving in slow-mo. I pulled my sidearm from its holster. And for the first time in my life, I fired it.

The soldier who had been scourging my future wife fell to the ground like a statue that has broken free of its pedestal. The bullet had ripped through the back of his head and left a very nasty exit wound on his face. As he toppled over, I scrambled over to Rachel.

Rachel, my darling vixen, lay there on the rocky floor. The poor thing, she had cuts and scars all over her. Her clothes were all ripped up and her fur had been torn off in several places.

I dropped to my knees beside her; my worst fears had come to fruition. The poor thing didn't even look like my Rachel, she was that badly beaten. Fortunately, she was still breathing, but barely. I scooped up her hands in mine. With a weak and stiff movement, she turned her head to face me. And what I saw shocked me.

She smiled. I couldn't believe it, but she was smiling. After all the bad things that had happened, she still had found the strength to smile. "Keith?"

I squeezed her hand tightly. "Yeah, babe! It's me!"

"Keith, before I go, I need to tell you something."

"Go? Go where sweetie?"

With the last bit of strength she could muster, she placed a finger on my trembling lips to silence me. Her eyes were turning glassy; she just didn't have any strength left. "This is not your fault. Don't blame yourself. I love you, Mister...Military...Man..."

She tried to sit up to kiss me, but I went down to her. I wish that kiss would've lasted forever, but time doesn't wait. So we both broke that kiss, knowing it would be our last.

Rachel smiled at me one last time, closed her eyes...and died.

"I love you too, Silk." It was the only thing I could think of to say. It was all I could say. My eyes flooded with tears. I squeezed her hand tightly in mine, as if that would keep her in this world. But it just wasn't meant to be. I placed a kiss on her cheek, because she was still my Rachel. I removed the ring from my pocket and slipped it on her finger. I wanted that to be a sign, a testament to our love.

If I had all the time in the world, I would've spent it with her in her final moments to make sure that she didn't leave me behind without a proper goodbye. But my mourning would not last, as I heard the sound of boots hurrying towards me.

I didn't expect for things to be that simple. I had shot a man, a comrade, in effort to save what the state had labeled as a "slave". But I was too shaken to fight anymore. I stood up and turned to face...my commander.

Virgil stood there, inspecting what used to be one of the base's lance corporals. "Captain Israel, I expect a full explanation for this."

I probably did the stupidest thing I could've done. As stupid as it might've sounded, I gave a very quip reply, "Sir! No, Sir!"

He was taken aback, "What was that, Captain?"

"No goddamn fucking way, Sir!" I pointed my .357 at my commander. Several of his escorts raised their rifles to protect the man, but they probably did it for show than anything else. All the troops here had never fired a shot at anyone in their entire lives, I had a funny feeling that today wouldn't be any different.

"Captain! Be reasonable!"

"You can kiss my ass, Sir!"

I walked over the lift, pistol still pointed at Virgil's head. It was pointless to try and kill him, because then I probably would've been shot for real. I hit the button to go up and not until the doors closed did I lower my weapon. It really hurt me to leave Rachel's body (God, I hate saying that) there, but I had no choice. I was in no condition to carry her out.

When the doors opened, the hallways seemed less hectic. This was probably because no one outside the mines had gotten wind of my actions. There was still time, I had to get to the car. With a very swift, yet calm pace, I made for the officer parking lot. As I exited the lobby, I heard a siren go off. The base was on high alert.

I got in the car and made toward the front gate. The grunts stared in shock as their former leader raced towards them at top speed in a military-issued car. One of them tried to close the gate, but I just mowed it down. When I was clear of the gate, I floored it. One of them tried to fire a warning shot, but it only succeeded in blowing my taillight.

To my surprise, there was no pursuit. I had committed three crimes that were easily punishable by death: Homicide, intent to harm a superior officer and the theft of government property (the car). So I was pretty much in the doghouse. Like it or not, XX-31 was my home, my source of income and the only place where I was accepted.

The thought about asking Mr. Axelridge for a place to stay was out of the question, I had already caused him too much pain. However, I did manage to put a letter on his doorstep. I told him that Rachel was dead and that he would never have to see me again. I told him that Rachel went peacefully, but I don't think that it made him feel any better.

So I left Maxim with as much speed as possible. I got rid of the car because it would only attract attention. Not to say that I was safe. Just the fact that I was a human male was huge give away. I stayed away from Maxim, trying to find work here and there. I worked simple jobs where no one asked questions so long as the work got done. I found a measly apartment to stay in.

And I was fine with that. It beat living a lie in Maxim. For awhile I felt like a criminal, a no-good killer. But it soon dawned on me that it wasn't my doing that had my lover killed and my would-be father-in-law hurt. It was Virgil's. He was the one who had decided to start loaning money, a practice that is forbidden outside any federal bank He was the one who planed on taking the government by the balls, not me. He was the one who made thousands of slaves suffer all for some shiny rocks. He was the one who abducted the only family I had ever known and made them suffer.

So, I honed my skills. I bought guns, started training. I went to ranges, got to practicing. I didn't really know what I was going to do, but I knew I had to be prepared for whatever it was. I spread the message on the underground that anyone looking for a hired gun should contact me. Then, I got my first assignment; Mr. Dante Lockheed.

So I shall take up the quarrel with the foe, for my Rachel. The torch is mine, to hold it high, because I've broken faith with her who died. She does not sleep, though poppies blow amid the crosses, row on row.