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Hey peeps. I know in my journal I said I'd have this out a few weeks ago. Anyway, my mate may have forgotten to copy edit it when he said he would... and again.... and then went on holiday... but finally he did it ^_^'' Another reason for the delay was that last week my own grandfather passed away and what with travelling for the funeral etc. I've not had much of a chance to look over the edits and sort it out until now. Anyway, hope you all enjoy. Take care of yourselves.

College Life 11

"Mammy are you're sure you'll be alright by yourself?" It was time to leave, but Luca repeated the question for what must have been the fifth time in the past three days.

"Yes, yes, Luca. I've already told you, I'll be fine. Besides, I'm not going to be by myself; I've got this bitch to look after, don't forget." She gestured at Charlotte who had just gone hurtling down the hallway to presumably bark at a squirrel in the garden that she'd seen through a window. "Anyway, Moira comes to visit every day and I go to mass every morning. If they think I'm on my last legs then I'll go live in that convent nursing home down the road. But not a moment before that!" She added with a gesticulating finger. Luca sighed at her mother's stubbornness and tenacity. Sometimes she couldn't help but wonder if the badger was meant to be a donkey the entire time but had suffered a genetic abnormality during her embryological development. Nonetheless there was no use arguing with her. It was time to leave or the rest of the family were going to miss their plane. They all exchanged a hug with the elderly badger until Diego was the only one yet to exchange some form of physical pleasantry.

"It was lovely meeting you", he said with an outstretched paw. Suddenly he was pulled into a hug by Leo's grandmother, who must have been nearly a foot shorter than him. Pulling his head down she whispered into his ear.

"You take care of my grandson you hear me." She gave a rough tug of his shirt to get her point across.

"I don't intend to do anything less," he replied with a caring smile. She nodded in return and stepped back.

"Well get going, you've got a plane to catch and I'm not having you stay another night. It's hard enough just having to deal with her." As if on cue Charlotte came pelting up the hallway. The English pointer appeared briefly at the door before there was a skittering of claws on tiles and a resounding crash as she collided with the door at the other end of the hall. Luca chuckled before embracing her mother one more time.

"Okay. There's frozen spaghetti and casserole in the freezer. I've written instructions for how to use the microwave and the-"

"Yes, yes, I know Luca now hurry up."

"Okay, okay we're going. Take care."

"You too. And don't forget, all of you, to say your prayers." There was a half-hearted noise in response from the group as they got into the car before driving back to the airport.

She waved as their car pulled out of the driveway. Closing over the gate, she watched as the rest of her family slowly receded into the distance, eventually disappearing around a bend and leaving her alone. A wet nose nuzzled her paw and she looked down to see Charlotte sitting on the ground, looking up at her; almost reminding her that she wasn't completely alone.

The two of them turned and returned to the house. Teresa looked around the living room and to the old, slightly tattered armchair that had been Peter's de facto "seat". She had sat on this chair countless times in the past. But somehow, as she sat there this time, knowing that she wouldn't be asked to move from it ever again, the house seemed to get a lot emptier. Charlotte rested her head on her mistress' lap as the badger as the reality of the loss of her husband started to slowly sink in.

***

For Leo and Diego, time passed uneventfully for the next few days. They spent most of their time in the former's room studying, occasionally taking breaks to play some variety of videogame or watch an anime.

One evening Diego was sitting on Leo's bed with his back against the headrest. Leo was curled up beside him with his head on the tiger's lap, testing him on the various adrenergic receptors in the different tissues of the body and what effects they had. As they finished up, and while Leo was starting to mentally prepare questions on the different kinds of agonists and antagonists, Diego looked down at the canine in his lap and ran a digit along the bridge of his nose.

"Hey, you wouldn't mind if I went into central London for the evening would you?" Diego asked as his paw moved further back along the wolf's head before scratching him behind the ears. Leo raised his head from the tiger's lap and gave him a look of confusion.

"Uh, sure I guess. Mind if I ask why?"

"I just wanna go help out at the bar I worked in for a bit. The only reason I'm here today is because I was given the opportunity to work there after all."

"Bar?" Leo's eyebrows were raised as his confusion merely escalated.

"The gay bar..." Diego replied. The wolf cocked his head in response rapidly reaching his limit for possible confusion-expressing gestures. It suddenly hit Diego that Leo had originally fallen asleep by this point when listening to his story in the church but they'd both forgot to bring it up after the subsequent events. Diego repeated his story to bring the wolf up to speed with everything, at which point a toothy grin spread across the wolf's face.

"So you were basically the eye candy?"

"What? I-no! I was a bartender. I was hired for more than just my looks." He scratched the back of his head before letting out a defeated sigh: "not that I didn't have the odd compliment every now and again.... ok maybe once a week... every night... multiple times-okay maybe I was more popular because of my looks but I was actually working. I took orders and stuff."

Leo gave the tiger a cheeky knowing nod much to the latter's mild frustration before resting his head on the tiger's lap once more.

"Well that's fine of course... but only if I come with you. Can't have any horny guys trying to feel you up on my watch."

Leo texted Luca to let her know what was happening before the two set off. While nervous about Leo going to any kind of gay bar she also trusted Diego enough to not be taking them somewhere unsafe.

After about an hour of buses and subways in which they unfortunately found themselves caught in the evening rush hour they finally reached their destination. Diego let out a quiet happy sigh to himself. The outside hadn't changed at all since the first time he'd seen it. In fact if it wasn't for Leo's presence Diego may well have doubted the fact that he had ever entered the bar in the first place and that everything else had been a dream. Nonetheless a gentle touch on his paw and a reassuring smile from a handsome hairless wolf reminded him that he was in the here and the now.

Together they walked into the bar and almost instantaneously Diego felt the edges of his mouth pull up into a small smile. Nothing had changed; the layout, the people, even the smell of the place were all the same. Two brown leather couches sat in a corner near the window. A table lay between them with boxes of old board games underneath it and a rainbow flag hanging on the wall above. A large open space for dancing filled the middle of the room and high wooden tables filled the remaining walls except for a small stage on the right hand side. This was occasionally the home to small music performances and sometimes performances tailored to the more mature tastes of some of the clientele.

Amidst a sea of living happy memories, one face stood out. Not because it was different from the rest; it had managed to weather the last few months without changing either, but it radiated with a greater familiarity and warmth than anything else in the entire bar. Almost instinctively Diego felt his pace quickening as he approached the bar only to vault over it at the last moment and take a surprised-looking otter into a powerful spinning hug.

"Hey Olly," the tiger rumbled happily. The otter regarded him with a look of curiosity before a look of recognition gleamed in his eyes and a huge smile spread across his already happy and welcoming face.

"Diego?!What's with the new look?! And who's your friend? Don't tell me he's turned you into a Skinner has he? Oh, whatever it's wonderful to see you!"

"Ha! Like I'd voluntarily become a Skinner, far too cold - especially for this time of year. No, this is my boyfriend, Leo." He paused for a moment. "And it's... uh... it's the big C I'm afraid." Olly's smile instantly faded. In all honesty it had been a charade from the second he noticed that Diego was hairless. He'd known Diego long enough to know he wasn't interested in the Skinner movement which meant it could only really be one of two things: some kind of joke for a charity or something along those lines, or... the other thing.

"Well then, drink on the house. Nothing like a Cosmo to help the curative process eh?" His smile was clearly strained but his body language spoke volumes. The otter's tail was limp, his shoulders were slumped and his normally hyperactive waist was as lifeless as a cold turkey. Diego had only ever seen him like this once before and that was when he was saying his last goodbye before leaving for university.

"No, no. I'm here to help, not to get wasted. Besides, I know you just want to fill me up with enough cosmos to get my pants off anyway." This elicited a weak chuckle from the otter, who turned to give Diego a dismayed look.

"Diego, if you're sick I don't want you straining yourself. Besides, you don't need to hang about here with me. It's the festive season, go spend it with your boyfriend."

The tiger shook his head and looked below the counter, making a mental note of what bottles were and weren't there before slipping a paw sensually into the otter's right hand pocket and whipping out a set of keys.

"I'm gonna bring in some stock. And no buts." Diego was gone before the otter had a chance to retort. He quickly made his way out of a door at the far end of the bar and walked down the hallway. On his right hand side was a plain-looking white wooden door. The paint was starting to flake off in places but apart from that it looked the same as it had back then. He ran his paw over the familiar door handle before passing on to the end of the hall where another large black door stood. Quickly unlocking the door, he made his way into the poorly-lit store room.

As he stood there, back against the closed door, he couldn't help but wonder if all of this had been a huge mistake. Seeing the old place made him feel like he was home again and yet he couldn't help but worry about whether letting Olly see him like this was a poorly-thought-out decision. Sure, any good friend would be disappointed if they found out a close friend had cancer. But Olly hadn't simply been a good friend. Over the course of the months that Diego had spent working here, their relationship had progressed to a more physical form. At first Olly had drawn the line in a very matter-of-fact way. It was to be purely physical, no mushy gushy romance associated, just two good guy friends. Diego accepted the terms and was pretty happy for it to stay that way. However, at no point would he have objected if Olly amended the terms. Indeed for months it did stay that way. Olly had let the tiger move in with him so they could split the rent. Admittedly, as the date for Diego to leave approached, Olly had, in hindsight, grown slightly agitated. It was clear that something was up, but Diego didn't want to read too deeply into it. Looking back, perhaps he should have - at least before he decided to show his hairless mug back here again. Olly had made him promise to come down and help out whenever he was free and in town. At the time Diego thought it was just playful banter, but perhaps Olly wanted to pick up where they had left off. Maybe he wished they never had left off in the first place. Diego put his head in his paws and shook it in frustration. How had he been so ignorant?!

He sighed to himself and rubbed his paw over the bridge of his muzzle before looking around the room. He moved quickly and purposefully between the crates, grabbing one that was perched precariously atop a stack of three. He then spun around and added another to his collection before finally picking up a third one as he was about to leave. Finally came his favourite part. All of his training hadn't been for nothing. Leaning over to one side he lifted his right leg gracefully to shoulder height above his waist and brought it down on the door handle. As the door crept open, he slid his leg down, returning it to its natural position while simultaneously opening the door, once more exposing himself to the brighter lights in the hallway. If I'm going to learn how to dance, I might as well make use of it.

Putting down the crates to lock the door behind him (a skill he hadn't quite mastered with just one foot), he made his way back into the bar. Olly still wasn't quite looking himself as his tail swished far too slowly for the characteristically jovial otter. It was to be expected after all. Especially if he was right about Olly's feelings.

"Yeah, so that bear over there in the corner is Derek. He's wearing a plaid shirt now but give him half a chance and he'll get into leather in a heartbeat. The guy's like some kind of superhero. You say it's leather night and one minute he's in a shirt and chinos, the next minute it's a harness and chaps," Olly explained to Leo. He seemed to be acquainting him with the local clientele. Fortunately for the wolf, today wasn't quite as happy-go-lucky as the evening that Diego had first turned up. Although, without enough knowledge of how the bar worked, Leo couldn't be sure as to whether or not it may still develop into such a spectacle. Were leather nights a regular theme? Were there other themed nights? Who knew - maybe he'd even get to see "Derek" in a harness tonight. In his mind he grinned at that but he wasn't going to let it show; no, he would bide his time and wait to tease Diego about Derek the leather bear on another occasion.

Diego smiled to see the two of them talking cordially. It could in retrospect have been much worse and not just between Leo and Olly. Derek was here. He was probably already estimating Leo's measurements and was preparing his lines carefully to try and get the wolf into whatever leather accessories he could. It wasn't that he would've been hitting on Leo; he tried to get everyone and anyone into leather, a feat that he actually managed to accomplish one night while Diego was still working here. While he would've found it amusing, he wasn't sure how Leo would've reacted to a hulking bear like Derek explaining to him the joys of leather against one's fur (or in the wolf's case, skin) and the intense feeling of masculinity it brought with it.

"Glad to see the two of you are getting on well," he said with a cheery smile and gentle nudge against the otter.

"Why wouldn't I be getting on well with such a stud muffin? If you're not careful he's going to become my number one and you'll be bumped down to number two."

"Heh, sure I will," he said with a cheeky grin as he elbowed the otter to one side. Setting the crates down he quickly got to work, filling up the shelves with stock and rearranging the fridge so that old bottles were brought to the front whilethe new lukewarm bottles were moved to the book. Leo couldn't help but marvel at the big cat as he worked; it seemed almost effortless, bordering on instinctual. It shouldn't have come as a surprise to the wolf, but at the same time it kind of did. People in school had always acknowledged Leo for his grades, always joking about how clever he was and how he was going to simply waltz into studying medicine at Camford. While he would routinely laugh it off, he had believed it to some degree. He knew he scored top grades, there was no doubt about that - but in retrospect, he didn't think he was clever. All the wolf did was spend hours studying. He wasn't a member of any school clubs and, while he had previously dabbled in sports like fencing outside of school, he hadn't kept them up when it came to his final few years. If anything, with the amount of time he spent making notes, and reading ahead, and then revising, and then making notes of his notes, it would have been a miracle if he didn't get the place. But looking at Diego as he worked he couldn't help but feel so vastly inferior. Here was someone who had not only missed school for much of his final year, he had also held down a job at the same time, found time to go to the gym and taken up dance lessons. And while his grades were ultimately lower than Leo's the fact that he still managed to get the grades he needed on top of everything else was nothing short of some supernatural feat.

Suddenly the whole room felt kind of stuffy and it occurred to Leo that Olly had been saying something that he hadn't quite been paying attention to. He blinked his eyes in exaggerated surprise before grinning sheepishly.

"Um, I'm really sorry, there's a...uh... beefcake behind the bar that momentarily distracted me. I'm gonna take a breather outside for a sec. I dunno if it's me but it's starting to feel really hot in here."

"Oh, that's okay, you go have a breather. I can be a bit much for the newcomers," the otter replied with a smile. When Diego finished reorganising the stock he gave the smaller mustelid a hearty pat on the back.

"Hey, go have a fag. I'll man the fort for a bit."

"Yeah, I might do that, thanks."

Leo was leaning against a windowsill on the outside of the pub when the otter came out, cigarette in mouth, holding it down to the small flame of the pink plastic lighter between his two paws. Looking at the ground briefly he noticed some leaves blowing down the path. He noted the wind direction and stood downwind of the wolf. Leo wasn't really sure what to say. On the one hand he just wanted to be lost in his own thoughts while on the other hand he knew the otter had just received some pretty bad news. It would be easy to play it off that he was merely ignorant of how close Diego and the otter were, but deep down he knew he should probably say something, anything to comfort Diego's friend but words temporarily escaped him. In the end it was the otter who broached the subject.

"So, I take it you're not just a skinner then."

"Um, I'm guessing that's someone who shaves for fun or maybe sexual pleasure?" The otter nodded silently in response as he took another puff from the cigarette. "Then no, I'm afraid not. You can probably guess what happened. His hair started falling out in the shower one day. He was... he was very scared, to say the least."

"I don't blame him." The otter replied sullenly.

"It was kind of a rash decision on my part. I went back to my room later that night and just took it all off. It's hard to go through something like that on your own. I just wanted to be there, y'know? Even if it's just one other person, it's nice to know that you're not alone." At this point the otter had turned away. For all the wolf knew, he was simply relighting his cigarette. Then there was a loud sniff and the cigarette was dropped to the floor. It was barely half smoked but the otter drove his heel into it. Even when the cigarette was clearly out the otter's foot continued to grind into it with greater intensity until he started to angrily stamp it. Leo's ears twitched as he heard what he knew was a cry of anguish being held back against gritted teeth. Out of nowhere the wolf found himself with a teary otter burying his wet muzzle into his hairless neck.

"Why?! Why did it have to be him, Leo? I don't understand. He's too young. He's too...special. I-I don't want to say goodbye for a second time."

"I'm sorry Olly." He wanted to say more to reassure the otter, to tell him that everything would be okay and that the treatment would make it all better. But he knew it was a lie. Diego didn't look like he was getting better, the tumours had spread at an alarming rate and unless there was some sudden change in the efficacy treatment or the cancer then... The wolf shook his head and pushed the thought to the back of his mind - as far back as it could possibly go. "How close were the two of you?"

"We weren't," the otter lied with a loud sniff of his nose. "We were just friends with benefits. Fuck buddies who happened to be work colleagues. Nothing more. We agreed that it wouldn't progress to a relationship, that feelings wouldn't come into it." He sighed to himself. "I didn't want feelings to come into it. He was way younger than me. I was 29, he was 17 pushing 18. I knew he was going to go off to university and I'd be by myself again. I didn't mind that at first, I knew I could always go back to quick hook ups. I mean hey, easy hook ups with horny gay furs is one of the perks of my job. But... I couldn't stop myself falling for him. God, I didn't want to, I knew it would break my heart but I did and he was either too young or too oblivious to notice. There's just something wonderful about him; something that makes it impossible not to love him. He brings a smile to my face whenever he enters the room, I could watch him dance for hours on end and you probably don't even need me to tell you about what he's like under the sheets."

"Heh, yeah." Leo forced a strained laugh. It didn't surprise him that the tiger and the otter were previously close and surprisingly he didn't even mind what was essentially Diego's ex weeping into his shoulder, confiding feelings that he might not have even expressed to the man who was currently holding down the fort inside. What surprised him the most was that he hadn't really envisaged Diego as being particularly sexually active. He'd never expressed any kind of primordial state of arousal with the wolf but had apparently done so multiple times with the otter. The otter picked up on the pause.

"You guys haven't...?"

"No, not really."

"Have you tried to initiate anything?"

"I wouldn't know where to start," Leo said as he scratched the back of his head. He could feel himself blushing and cursed moments like this that he had no fur to hide the redness in his cheeks.

"Ah. You need to understand. It's hard to explain this... Ah, think of it like this. Diego is a dancer both in and out of the bed. He'll move with you and match your intensity. If you throw him a bone he'll throw you one back. If you don't, he's not going to force himself on you. I mean, I'm sure he doesn't mind since you're still together but, well, it's just that, we kinda did it quite regularly... Not meaning to brag or anything like that!" The otter said as he backpedalled quickly on his statement, "I just mean to say he might have chronic blue balls at this stage."

Leo let out another nervous chuckle not really sure what he was supposed to be saying to any of this. Was the otter telling him to service Diego's needs? Or was the otter trying to suggest that they both needed sex in their relationship? Things had been going fine but if Diego really was used to having it regularly had he been going through sexual cold turkey this entire time? "Anyway, enough about sex. I'm sorry I brought it up. How's his proaganosis or whatever it's called? He's gonna get better right?"

"I'm afraid I don't know." Leo said as a lump formed in his throat. He'd learnt to live every day keeping that thought at bay. It was his only way of coping with what he knew to be the reality of the situation. He knew that if he elaborated, he and the otter quickly would have quickly swapped roles. "Anyway we should be getting inside. Diego will be wondering where we've got off to; a cigarette only lasts so long."

As they walked back into the bar they were met with wolf whistles and cat-calls; a crowd had formed around the bar and as Leo and Olly pushed their way through they found Diego shaking up a cocktail. That alone would have been unremarkable if it wasn't for the fact that he was simultaneously putting on a leather harness while doing so. As the final buckle was tightened up he strained the bright red cocktail into a martini glass and popped half a strawberry into the mixture. He handed it to a rather large bear, who offered him a £20 note with instructions to keep the change. Diego nodded his thanks with a mischievous wink, before turning to serve the next customer.

The wolf's jaw had dropped so far at the spectacle that it was currently occupying a space somewhere between the mantle and the core of the Earth. Olly on the other hand gave a mock head shake of disapproval.

"We never did manage to keep you in a shirt for an entire night did we?"

"Pfft, more like you guys would never let me go an entire night without forcing me to take it off!" The crowd gave an approving laugh and dissipated back to the various spots in the bar from whence it had originated. Diego leaned over the counter towards Leo and gave a naughty grin. "So...what'll it be guv'nor?"

"I'm good, dear," the wolf responded as he poked the tiger in the nose, forcing him back to his side of the bar.

The rest of the night went by in a blur as Leo marvelled at the skill of both Olly and Diego and how at times they seemed to be working in perfect sync. Bars had never really been Leo's "scene" per se. He didn't really see the point of getting drunk, he wasn't looking to hook up with someone and if he wanted to have fun he would play videogames at home. He'd never really had the opportunity to watch cocktails being made, and certainly not as dramatically. Pieces of chopped-up strawberries or limes sailed through the air from his tiger at one end of the bar to the otter with a Boston shaker at the other. They had clearly spent hours practicing; getting the aims and trajectories perfect as piece after piece of fruit landed into the shaker, even as the otter was pouring some form of alcohol on top of them.

Over the next few days the otter and the tiger continued to work together, taking whatever opportunity they could do show Leo the basics. While Diego had been a natural, Leo wasn't quite as strongly suited to life behind a bar as the first 5 pints he tried to pull ended up going straight down the sink, deemed "irrefutably undrinkable," while his first attempts at cocktails left large chunks of fruit where there shouldn't have been any. By the end of the week, pouring basic drinks was something he had become competent at. While he enjoyed learning something new, and it kept him from getting lost too much in his own thoughts, everything that Olly had talked about with him kept surfacing in the back of his mind, but every time he thrust it aside; there were more important things to think about. He didn't want to mention it to Diego though; he knew it was a conversation that had meant to stay private. However, when he watched the otter and the tiger working happily together in perfect unison, the wolf couldn't help but wonder if he had perhaps unknowingly stolen the tiger from his true Mr Right.

The final day before they had to return to university arrived all too suddenly. Leo had become reasonably proficient behind the bar and was occasionally left behind it by himself while Diego was grabbing stock and Olly having a cigarette. As closing time was fast approaching and the last of the customers were starting to leave, the otter approached the big cat and took his paw. Mentally steeling himself, he looked up to the tiger's face.

"Diego, can I talk to you in private?" Diego looked puzzled. The otter took a deep breath and, after a moment, continued. Needless to say, the next few words made both Diego and Leo suddenly very apprehensive. "...It's about... us... you and me"