FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

Next morning Tom was woken by the shrill beeping of his alarm clock. He raised his head a bit, and seeing that it was still six in the morning, he slammed his hand on the clock, silencing it, ... for five minutes.

<Beep, beep, ...>

"Alright! Alright! I'm up," Tom mumbled. Trying in vain not to wake Shau'i he sneaked out of bed and dressed silently in his best suit.

After preparing breakfast Tom went to wake Shau'i.

She opened her eyes and then grinned.

"I've never seen you with a suit before".

"Oh well. It is expected of someone in a meeting or presentation," Tom replied, "By the way, breakfast is ready."

A few minutes later, after they sat down at the table and began to eat, Shau'i noticed that Tom hardly touched anything and stared into his cup of coffee, seemingly lost in thought.

"What's wrong?"

"It's nothing," Tom replied, his eyes still focused in the infinite depths of his cup.

"Aw, c'mon!" she looked at him and grabbed his right hand.

<I see. Don't worry, it's probably normal to feel anxious before presenting a project.>

<It is. But my next contract depends on it.>

<I'm sure it will go well, I believe in you.>

<Thanks Shau'i. But are you sure you're OK alone?>

<Yes, I will be fine.>

<It's already time. Bye then.>

<Bye, ... and good luck.>

*

It was like Shau'i had predicted. Even though Tom was very nervous he kept it together and presented his project well. It felt really weird to Tom as the company's stakeholder congratulated Tom on his excellent work. Later his boss announced, that he earned a large bonus but had to wait for about a month for more work to give the other engineers time to integrate his components into the prototype.

The new contract wasn't even mentioned directly, Tom was just sent to the personnel office to sign it. He was surprised as he noticed that his contract was prolonged not only by three, but five years.

<What a great day,> Tom thought an hour later, sitting in a small cafeteria at the mall and eating his second sandwich for lunch, still smiling from ear to ear.

*

Even though Tom hated shopping, he still was in a very good mood strolling through the shopping mall. Everything was funny. Even the strange looks on the cashiers face because of all the women underwear and the very long shopping list couldn't dampen his spirits.

He was just standing in front of last shops cashier desk when suddenly a strange feeling crept over him. A moment later he almost lost his balance as hundreds of horrible images flashed through his mind.

"Sir?" the cashier asked uncertainly.

"Are you alright Sir?"

"What? Oh I'm sorry, how muchdid you say?"

"Hundred and fifty-five. Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes, it's nothing."

Tom paid and left hastily. He almost ran to the car and dumped the shopping bags on the back seats. Then he started the engine and was off, roaring along the motorway at top-speed towards the outskirts of the town and the small village.

Even though it felt like the longest journey ever, Tom had made record time as he pulled into the driveway. With mounting anxiety, he jumped out of the car and after unlocking the door quickly he strode inside, calling her name.

For a moment he hoped that his fears were groundless and that everything was alright. But no answer came.

"Shau'i, are you OK?"

Still nothing.

As Tom discovered the kitchen and living room empty, fear started to grip him. At first glance the bedroom was empty too, but then he heard a faint sniffling noise. Rounding the bed, he found Shau'i on the floor. She had curled up into a tight ball and was trembling and twitching all over, her face splattered with tears.

Tom knelt down beside her immediately and reaching out for her with his hand he asked "What's wrong?"

She didn't react. But as soon as he touched her side he jerked back as if a powerful electric shock had hit him. A rush of anguish and another series of images just had raced through him. Tom stared at her for a moment and already guessed what was happening. There was nothing else for it. Bracing himself and inhaling deeply, he grabbed her left shoulder with both hands.

The force of her emotion was incredible and all-consuming. Tom felt like his thoughts were swept away with sorrow.

<Shau'i!> he called with his mind, but no answer.

Then, a few moments later, like something had clicked inside of her, Shau'i's sorrow was replaced by scorching anger and hatred. Her eyes flew open and Tom saw the cold gleam again. Now panicking, he began to shake her and yelled with both his voice and mind, "Shau'i! Snap out of it!" At that her eyes rolled upwards and she fainted.

Tom stared at her limp form a few seconds and then went to the kitchen for a glass of cold water and splashed the water into her face. She shrieked, coughed, spluttered and her eyes flew open once more. Tom was relieved that the cold gleam had vanished.

"Are you alright?"

"I remember, ... everything".

And even though her face was still drenched in water Tom could already see fresh tears in her eyes. He bent over and hugged her tightly. The familiar torrent of sorrow enveloped him again, but this time was different, he could feel that she was still with him and not completely gone.

They sat there, arm in arm, for what seemed like hours, Shau'i crying and sobbing into his shoulder.

After a long time, when her sob had died down a bit, her first coherent words where "I need to go."

Tom just stared at her, mouth hanging slightly open. She seemed to steel herself and raised her head, looking up at him.

"I need to leave."

"But why?" Tom had found his voice again.

"I ... I'm a ... monster" she managed to press out, before succumbing to a fresh wave of tears again.

"What are you talking about? You are the sweetest person I've ever met."

"Y ... You don't understand. They trained me t .. to be a killer".

"I DON'T CARE!" said Tom clearly, "I trust you. I don't want you to go!"

This time it was Shau'i who stared incredulously, "Why? Why are you doing this for me?"

"Haven't you guessed yet? I really like you."

Shau'i was thunderstruck, too stunned to speak or even cry.

"You know Shau'i?" Tom continued, "I know you don't want to talk about what happened in your past but you need to tell someone. I can see how it's tormenting and hurting you. And it won't help if you pen it up."

She looked at him quite a while, silent tears spilling from her cheeks again. Then she nodded slightly and rested her head against Tom's chest. Taking a few deep breaths she began to dig in her memories, newly opened like a fresh wound.