FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

C hapter T** hree **** D eath W**ish

"Should I... just leave?" he said in a disappointed shaky voice as he turned himself to the door-way; slowly, hesitating for any sort of response out of the grumpy feline. If Cindy was any indication, Ethan assumed to find himself half way back down Alchris Mountain within a bristled-tail-flick of time.

"No..." he inhaled and contemplated "no..." the snow-leopard sighed and let his guard down before he lazily slumped into his chair, carelessly tossing a paw-full of papers onto his desk. The paper-pile swirling upon itself before cascading over and off the solid-wood surface before the aggravated feline leaned back to put his hind paws up upon his desk.

"You made it all the way up here, which in itself can be a challenge. But son, you look like shit. Did it ever occur to you that you should make yourself presentable for an interview? I know the weather is fucking shit outside, and I doubt you can't hold your bladder; but damn.." he kicked his paws off and learned forward to scurry through the heap of papers.

"E-.. Weiss"

"Yes, Weiss... also don't stutter nor slur no any kind of that bullshit." Mr. Callahan returned to his laid back position, not caring to retrieve his resume. "Did it ever occur to you to at least comb your fur or take a shower or something? If this..." he pointed a digit at Ethan, twirling it circularly "anomaly... happened on the way here, you could have taken a couple minutes to look at yourself in the mirror! This is where I would show you a mirror if I had one, but I'm not a pussy who carries that sort of thing on me. Cindy probably would have one though...."

"She seems nice" Lied Ethan.

Mr. Callahan turned to look Ethan dead in the eye and after an excruciating long moment he finally spoke "Yeah, you can say that..."

The feline's eyes rolled as he leaned back, distantly looking at the rooms decor. "Well lets get this over with, have a seat."

Ethan was already having serious doubts about all this, but if he somehow miraculously got hired and was left alone to work; then it would be worth while to get through this.

The drenched wolf sloshed as he walked toward the chair, about to sit himself down.

"Whoa whoa there boy, take off a layer first."

"E-excuse me?" He said in a light tone of discomfort and confusion.

"You're wet from ear to toe, mutt. Take off a layer of clothes before sitting in my chair. Also, what did I tell you about the stuttering?"

Ethan folded his ears and shifted his eyes a bit. Without thinking, a shaky paw trembled to grasp his belt buckle. Since his shirt was tucked in, he at least needed to loosen his pants first.

"Hahaha!" Mr. Callahan burst out with a deeply hysterical laughter, kicking his feet in a silly fit. "Mister..."

"Schreiber"

"Schrei.. eh, it doesn't matter.. Weiss, you don't need to take off your pants for an interview! Just sit the fuck down before my sides split!"

Ethan complied, wetly sitting in his own moisture. It could have gone better.

Mr. Callahan was still cracking up, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye. It was clear he was unable to settle himself down as the wet white wolf just sat there in a poised position; waiting patiently.

"You can take off your jacket, it must be retaining the most water." he, himself, stuttered through his own giggling as Ethan lightly nodded and stood up. The chair gave out a wet crinkle when Ethan got up. His heart was already racing; Murphy's law has nothing on him, he could already feel his mind start to deteriorate and any mental preparation he previously had been working on for weeks was out the window. He sighed softly to himself as he approached the coat-rack.

Ethan was already too far in deep to call it quits now. He foolishly put all his eggs in one basket and it was hard for him to think of a horrible enough analogy to justify the fate damning fate they've met.

And with that, his elaborate metaphorical eggs that began to drop turned out to be quite real.