FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

"Nick!" Finnick yelled, watching as Nick ran out of the apartment. He struggled to put his shorts back on and Fangs did the same. As quickly as he could manage, Finnick dashed out of the front door, bolt as quickly as he could down the stairs and out of the front doors of the lobby.

The sidewalk was completely empty, making the fennec think it would be easy to find the fox. Even though the sun was setting and the street lights were on, Finnick was determined to find Nick no matter what.

Shit! I fucked up. I really fucked up. There's nothing I can say to make it okay, either. The small fox looked around frantically, looking for any sign of Nick but before he could start running off he felt a paw on his shoulder.

"Finnick! Are you alright?" Fangs asked, looking down at the smaller predator. As Finnick met the wolf's gaze he felt a rage boiling hotter and hotter within him. Though Finnick blamed himself for what happened he couldn't pass up taking it out on someone.

"You!!" The fennec snarled. "This is all your fucking fault! You just had to come along and shake that ass all up in my face! And look what happened! You ruined everything, slut!

"Heh. Me?" Fangs scoffed, oddly calm despite everything that was just said to him. "I'm not the one who threw everything he had away over some guy he barely met. But, I'm not mad that you did."

"You sneaky little bitch!" Finnick barked, the wolf's words registering in his mind.

He wanted to ruin our relationship the whole time! But what for? Does he want me? Did he actually want Nick? What does it matter? He got what he wanted...

"Look, I don't care about any of that anymore. From now on, don't fucking come near me or Nick," Finnick quickly turned around and ran off towards his van. He growled to himself, realizing the whole conversation was just a big waste of his time.

"Oh yeah? And just what are you gonna do? I'll give you some credit: You're pretty big down there but everywhere else you fall pretty...short," the wolf shook his head, chuckling at his pun as he walked after Finnick.

The fennec was running through the parking lot, his keys jingling in his paws. All he had to do was hop on the back and unlock the door. Making it to the van, Finnick looked back to see Fangs still walking slowly, his eyes were bright with confidence and his muzzle was turned up into a wicked grin. It was clear for Finnick to see that the wolf was enjoying this, but that was only because he thought the upper hand was his...

Finnick unlocked the back doors and quickly closed them. He crouched as low as he could get, hoping to lure the wolf as close as possible. All the while his arms were stretching out to grab something very special. Gotta do this right...only got one chance. Just like back in the day, Finn.

His breath caught in his throat and his ears perked, hearing the wolf clutch the latch on the door.

"Aww, hiding? I knew you were a scared little--" His words were cut short by Finnick swinging the bat as soon as the door was pulled open. A grin spread across Finnick's muzzle, hearing that distinct sound of blunt wood smashing against skull. It had been such a long time and the fennec didn't realize just how much he missed it. He was tempted to swing again but there were more important things at the moment. But the wolf's body hitting the ground and the blood dotting the end of his bat did bring back memories.

It was just a month after Nick and Finnick met. The short fox was showing Nick around the alleyways and they ran into the Red Marks, a duo consisting of both a marten and a flying squirrel. Finnick could tell they were a group of wannabes who only played the part and were too afraid to actually commit any crimes. The duo were quick to brandish knives at the foxes, demanding everything they had. A chuckle came from Finnick, reaching behind his back and grabbing his pistol.

It was so long ago but Finnick could remember it all so clearly. The two of them barely had time to beg for their lives before the fennec pulled the trigger twice. Looking back, it was a monstrous thing to do but at the time he loved it. It made him feel strong, like he was in control of everyone. He felt...big.

But once he turned around, Nick had a look of pure terror on his face. Finnick grabbed his paw and led him out of the alley before the cops showed up. They hid away in a shed behind an abandoned house and Nick was still shaking like a leaf. He sawNick cry like a cub and Finnick consoled him, telling the red fox that he did it to protect them both. Nick stopped crying but he made the fennec promise not to just kill someone for no reason like that. It has been 10 years since then...

Finnick shook his head, knowing that it wasn't the time to be thinking about things like that. Clutching the bat tightly in his paws, Finnick jumped out of the van. He looked down at the wolf, seeing he was out cold. From his nose dripped a trickle of blood and just as much came from his mouth. Finnick grinned to himself, flicking his tongue across the end of the bat. With the tang of blood on his tongue, he climbed back into the van. He scrambled to the driver's seat, turned the engine on and rolled off out of the parking lot, leaving Fangs on the pavement.

***

Nick got up from the couch he was sleeping on, blinking against the sunlight that beamed in his face. The memories of the last few days hit him again. Sitting up and stretching, Nick took in his surroundings. After looking around for a bit, the fox finally remembered where he was.

He remembered running down the sidewalk and stopping at a bar. After that things got fuzzy in the fox's mind. He was sure that he took hard shots but just thinking of it made his head start to hurt again. Somehow he ended up where he was now, spending most of yesterday crying and occasionally running to the bathroom to throw up.

"Hey. Ya feelin' any better?" a familiar voice softly asked.

"Ugh, yeah...Thanks, Gideon. I don't know what I did while I was drunk, but thanks for putting up with me," Nick sighed.

"Actually, I couldn't understand a word you were sayin' through all the cryin'. But whatever it was had you mighty upset," Gideon explained, sitting down on the couch next to Nick.

"You mean, I never told you?" Nick chuckled, but his ears hung low.

"Nah, but you kept sayin' 'He did this to me.' Couldn't really make sense of what you meant, but I stayed and patted ya on the back all that," Gideon explained, with a warm smile.

"Oh, well...It's Finnick. He--He cheated on me..." Nick forced himself to say, feeling his stomach churn just from the words being spoken.

The larger fox's smile disappeared and his gaze softened.

"Hey, Gid. How did I even get here?" Nick asked, looking around the living room.

"Oh, you were at the Gopher's Lounge. I was there too and you were takin' shots like there was no tomorrow. After your third one I asked you where Finnick was and you started crying. I took you back to my place and you passed out on the couch," the southern vulpine relayed.

All Nick could do was give a responsive nod, taking the other fox's word for it. When he tried to remember it only made his head hurt.

"H-Hey, where's Judy?" I asked, not seeing any sign of her.

"Ah, she left early. The ZPD called her up for some kind of emergency. But Judy did tell me she wanted to see you. Sorry, Nick," Gideon consoled.

***

"Look, Nick. I'm sorry. I know I fucked up but I've searched everywhere for you. I don't know where you are, but I'm gonna keep looking for you, babe. Just please call me back," Finnick said into his phone, hanging up and feeling his lip quivering. The thump of the gas pump distracted him for a moment. He used the step ladder he kept in the back of the van to put the gas pump back and threw the ladder into the back.

He spent the next hour searching the main business districts and even the shady alleys between them but there was no sign of the red fox anywhere. It was as if he just disappeared out of this air and it only made Finnick more riled up.

"Come on, Nick. I know you're around here somewhere," Finnick whispered to himself as he stopped at the red light.

The chime of his phone sounded, making the fennec's heart leap. Finnick picked up the phone as quickly as he could, pressing the answer button.

"Hello, Finny!" a familiar voice whispered from the other side.

"What the fuck do you want?" Finnick growled, gripping his phone tighter.

"Aww, come on. You know you missed me--" Whatever Fangs was about to say next was cut off by Finnick hanging up on him.

The light turned green and Finnick continued his search. All the while the white wolf was now on his mind and it pissed him off. He didn't know what Fangs still wanted and he couldn't care, either. But knowing the wolf was still trying to get at him, even after being hit over the head with a bat brought a feeling of dread. With nowhere else coming to mind, Finnick made a left turn towards the ZPD. He glanced at the time on the dash and wondered if Judy was still there. It was no secret to anyone who knew Finnick that the small fox hated asking others for help, but I know if anyone could find him it was her.

"It's alright, Gid. Actually, no it's not! I can't believe he would do this to me! I loved him with all my fucking heart and he I find him fucking someone else like it never mattered. Like I never mattered..." the fox ranted, finally noticing that he was pacing back and forth across the living room.

"I just don't get it, Gideon. Everything I've done lately has been for him. For the both of us. We've moved in together, I rented a whole apartment, I even quit my job for him! I just don't know what to do anymore," Nick admitted, sinking deeper into the couch.

Next to him, Gideon made a strange sound, like he clicked his tongue or something like that. He slowly placed a paw on the thinner fox's shoulder.

"Ya know what I think? I think you should at least call 'em. I've been in this situation before and it does hurt. I wanted to hate 'em, but I just couldn't... Look, all I'm saying is we both know that Finnick is...different from most. You might forgive him, you might not but you should at least hear him out first. See what he has to say for himself," Gideon suggested.

"Huh, where's all this sudden advice coming from, Pie-Boy?" Nick chuckled.

"Heh. Just thinkin' of what my old therapist would say. I used to do a lot of things when I was young. Things I ain't too proud of. Sometimes we mess up bad and ruin good a thing for ourselves. But I was given a chance to make things right. It's up to you if ya wanna do the same," the burly fox suggested.

He looked down at his own paws, clenching them. "I'm gonna not let Judy end up like that," Gideon said, more to himself than Nick.

As if on cue, Nick's phone buzzed in his pockets. There was a single voicemail message from Finnick. He inhaled slowly, preparing himself for whatever was about to be said to him. Before playing the message, Nick increased the speaker's volume so Gideon could hear it too.

"Look, Nick. I'm sorry. I know I fucked up but I've searched everywhere for you. I don't know where you are, but I'm gonna keep looking for you, babe. Just please call me back," Finnick's voice quavered over the phone. When the message stopped Nick just stared at the screen for about two seconds.

"See, I told you. He misses ya and he wants to make things right," Gideon said.

"It doesn't matter what he wants!" Nick growled, taking the other fox by surprise. "He cheated on me and I'm not just gonna turn around and act like it never happened!" Gideon said nothing in response, keeping his gaze on the carpet below.

"Look, Gid. I'm sorry. I just don't know what I should do," Nick sighed.

"Yeah, it's alright. Only you know what you wanna do," Gideon advised as he got up and walked towards his bedroom.

Nick sat on the couch, staring at the contact screen with Finnick's name at the top. But all the fox could think of was catching the fennec in the act, making him grit his teeth. I can't forgive him. I can't! No matter how much we've been through together.

Flopping down on the couch, Nick thought about what he and Nick had been through together, the good and the bad. From when they first met...the shootings, the hustles and the night they spent together.

"Finnick...You're a dick. And you always were one," Nick mumbled to himself, pressing the call button and closing his eyes.

***

Finnick sat in his van, parked in the lot of the ZPD, considering if he wanted to go through with this. He wondered how it would look walking inside and requesting to see Judy Hopps, only to tell her what had happened.

There's no fucking way she'd help me, Finnick grumbled to himself.

He was about to just bite the bullet and hop out of his van before the phone rang in his pocket. The small fox's heartbeat quickened as he checked the contact name. Upon reading the name, he almost dropped his phone and took a moment to compose himself before answering.

"Uh, hey..." Finnick answered, his ears flickering nervously.

"Hey," Nick responded curtly.

"Look, Nick. I'm sorry. I know I fucked everything up. But I just--"

"Finnick, what the hell is wrong with you?" Nick asked in a calm tone. "Look, we're not gonna do this over the phone. I'm at Gideon's. We need to talk about this." With those words, the call ended.

Finnick just stood there staring at his phone's screen. "Fuck," he growled to himself. I should have just said it upfront.

As quickly as he could, Finnick started up the van and peeled out of the parking lot. This whole time he was at Gideon's of all places...

It didn't matter where Nick was in Finnick's mind, because he was about to see his boyfriend again.

Most likely ex-boyfriend now, Finnick thought to himself as got in the fast lane towards outer Zootopia.

About ten minutes passed before Finnick pulled up in a dirt driveway. He wasted no time hopping out of his van, walking up the dirt path and up on the porch. Each step brought him closer and closer to Nick and the fennec only felt worse and worse. Trembling a bit, he knocked on the door and was almost immediately met with Nick standing behind the open door, staring him in the face.

"Hey. Uh, so you got my message?" Finnick mumbled. The red fox just rolled his eyes and walked forward.

Nick stopped alongside the fennec and made a gesture for him to follow. Nervously, Finnick traced after the taller fox's steps, down the porch and past the dirt path. Nick climbed into the van and stared out of the window. The small fox soon followed suit, climbing into the van as well.

"Look, let's talk about this," Nick stated, still staring forward.

"Alright," Finnick nodded.

"I...just wanna know why," Nick sighed, looking forward out of the window. The blank expression on his face already let Finnick know that he was already below the thin ice.

"Look, Nick. I know. I know what I did. But I didn't mean for any of this to happen. What happened back there was an accident," Finnick whined.

"No, it wasn't," Nick countered. Finnick looked up at the other fox in confusion. Before the smaller fox could say anything Nick continued. "You don't cheat on someone by accident. That's not how it fucking works, Finnick! Cheating means you decided to go behind your partner's back and fuck someone else!!" Nick snarled, turning his gaze back to Finnick.

"No, but look! It's not my fault, Nick. It was that wolf. He set us both up, this is what he wants! He wants me, Fangs and been calling me all day, but I've hung up on him every time. Just chill, Nick. Let me explain what's going on," Finnick defended.

"Now you're just making excuses. You're not gonna use him to justify what you did. Finnick, if you actually cared about me...You wouldn't have gone through with it in the first place," Nick huffed, turning back to the windshield.

"I know, I know. And I'm sorry, Nick. You think you're the only one who's upset about this? It fucking hurt me that I hurt you! And it makes me feel like a piece of shit that I'm the one doing this to you," Finnick choked out. Finnick looked over at Nick and the bigger fox just stood there, staring out the window.

"Let's just go home, Finnick." Nick sighed, pulling the seat belt over himself.

Finnick wasted no time turning on the van and peeling out of the dirt driveway before Nick decided to change his mind.

As they were making their way to the apartment Finnick shot a quick glance at Nick. He was just resting against the window, watching other cars pass by them. The ride was long and grueling for the both of them. There were so many things both foxes wanted to say but Nick stayed silent through sheer anger while Finnick stayed silent out of shame and guilt.

Why is this so hard? I mean...yeah. I cheated. But I didn't try to lie or deny it. And he won't even fucking look at me. I won't do this again, Nick. I promise, Finnick thought, his eyes still on the road ahead. Finally, they pulled into the Grand Pangolin Arms parking lot and Finnick parked the van.

"We're here," Finnick said flatly, taking the keys out of the ignition.

"Finnick..." Nick asked in a cold tone. "Do you love me?"

"What?" Finnick asked, his ears springing up.

"Do you even love me?" Nick asked again.

Of course I love you. You're my best friend. We've been through so much. Too much. I never wanted to hurt you. I'm such as fucking idiot. You're the best thing that ever happened to me and I tore apart everything. I'm so sorry, Nick. I do love you...so much, Finnick thought to himself.

But on the outside he failed to say anything. He knew that Nick wanted an answer just like that but the fennec couldn't bring himself to make those words in his head a reality.

Nick waited for Finnick to answer the question. But after a few seconds of silence, Nick opened the door and walked out towards the complex.