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Jubilation. That's the only word I could use to describe returning to the locker room. We were beyond elated, beyond excited. We were outright jubilant and, after doing a victory march around the field to the screams and shouts of our adoring "fans" (if high schoolers were even fans at all), we were heading back to the locker room stinking of dirt, grass and physical activity. But it wasn't everyday that the Lincoln High Archangels defeat the North Central Red Devils. It was a rivalry destined to last forever.

But the story I want to tell you started after our showers when everyone had shed their uniforms and were dressing in their civvies. The story of how I came out.

We had all agreed to go to one of our favorite pizza joints, Mama Maria's, and the coach had even agreed to pay for it. And of course, we'd chosen our guest of honor, as was our tradition--the teammate who scored the winning goal. This time, it was a young cheetah named Lucas Brown. Our team captain, Ahmed al-Farid (perhaps the cutest hyena I've ever seen), was just in the process of crowning him guest of honor when he said the words none of us ever expected.

"Sorry, I can't," Lucas answered, "I've got plans tonight."

I was only part way dressed when I heard that, just having pulled my shirt over my head, and I turned to look at Lucas. Everybody did because nobody turned down such a celebrated position.

"You're kidding," Ahmed gasped. "You knew we'd be doing this! We just crushed the Devils. You can't skip out on celebrating with us!"

"Yeah!" agreed Byron, the burliest, most docile bull I've ever met. "Dude, this is our moment! You cannot ditch us!"

"Sorry," Lucas said and he sounded genuinely sorry. "It just kinda happened."

"What kind of plans?" Blake Hunt wondered suspiciously. "A date?"

All of us were used to Blake's usual accusations--the rabbit always had a habit of teasing us by making statements like that. But this one somehow seemed a bit of a stretch. Lucas had always seemed too innocent, too pure, to date. Almost like he was afraid of the fairer sex. Apparently, Lucas hadn't been expecting the suggestion. He jumped in shock and looked back at Blake with such a look of... fear, I'd call it, that I was positive that this wasn't just a lucky guess. Perhaps Blake knew something.

"What...?" Lucas squeaked. Then, he cleared his throat in a pathetic attempt to sound more macho. "What do you mean by that?"

"Yeah," snorted Jack. This cocky stallion rolled his eyes before saying, "Ain't no way this little saint would ever have a girlfriend."

"Y-yeah, not a date," Lucas agreed, sounding oddly relieved. I listened carefully to the sound of his voice. What was that tone? It was more than relief. It sounded afraid. "Just a friend I've had since I was little. They wanted to celebrate with me."

"So this is someone," Blake pressed, amazed.

Lucas gasped, turning away from us. I watched him closely. I'd never seen him so squigged out and, at the time, I was fascinated by his reaction, but looking back, I think the guys should've backed off. I feel like I should've stepped up and told them to stay back but I couldn't bring myself to speak. Perhaps I was just a coward but I had never liked attention. This Dalmatian used his spots to disappear into the background.

"Is that why you played so hard today?" Ahmed was saying.

"Probably going to spend some quality time with her later," Jack agreed with a knowing wink.

"N-no! It's not like that!" Lucas insisted meekly. I'd never seen him so scared.

"Did you get her flowers and chocolates?" someone wondered. Everyone was talking at once and the names and faces started to disappear in the tangled mess of well-intended, though probably harsh, teasing.

Finally, Lucas's voice reached a pitch and tone that I'd never heard from him before. Everyone seemed to back away at once, seemingly understanding that they'd finally pissed him off.

"ENOUGH!" raged Lucas. "It's not like that! They're just a... a really close..." He trailed off.

"Luke, we're sorry," Ahmed started, moving forward. "We're just playing with you." He swallowed. "So, do we get to meet this friend maybe?"

"I don't know," Lucas said sadly. "I don't know if you'd have a lot to talk about."

"Luke? Are you in here?" A new voice broke into the locker room and we all turned to look at the door. A confident-looking Labrador sauntered into the locker room, quickly finding Lucas and dashing forward to give him a loving hug before kissing his cheek.

My heartbeat seemed to double as I watched the loving look the Lab was giving Lucas. The cheetah looked horrified, terrified and as the Lab pulled back, he seemed to understand he'd crossed some line.

"What's wrong?" the Lab wondered. He glanced around at our shocked looks then back at Lucas. Understanding dawned on us all at once. "You never told them, did you?"

"What're you doing here?" Lucas gasped desperately. "I told you I'd meet you outside!"

"Excuse the fuck out of me for wanting to congratulate my boyfriend"--the Labrador shouted the word to ensure everybody could hear--"on scoring the winning goal."

"BOYFRIEND?!" we all shouted in shock.

"Yes," the Labrador said with a smirk. "I'm Erich Hansen, Luke's boyfriend."

As if they'd never seen a Labrador before, everybody seemed to crowd around Erich, determined to ask him questions about being Lucas's boyfriend. How did they meet? What was it like to date Lucas? When did they meet? How long had they been dating? The usual questions such a surprise would bring. Yet as I looked around, nobody seemed amazed that Lucas had a boyfriend.

"Okay, guys, back off, let him breathe," Lucas finally ordered.

"They're just being friendly," Ahmed said. "Say, what'd you say your name was again, pooch?"

"Erich," the Labrador replied.

"We're about to go out to Mama Maria's for pizza to celebrate," Ahmed stated. "Always room for a plus one, especially if you're the guest of honor's other half."

"Pizza? I'd love to!" Erich said happily. "Can we, hon?"

Lucas looked away from Erich's insistent gaze before saying, "Y-yeah, sure. Anything for you."

At this point, I stepped away to head to my locker to finish dressing. I could hear the guys still chatting away and, even after I dressed, I waited. I didn't want to step out just yet and I was waiting for the locker room to clear before I did anything.

My mind was buzzing, a whirl of questions and worry and amazement and... all kinds of feelings I'd never thought of before. Out of everything I saw, nobody said anything about Lucas's boyfriend. They were okay with it. They even invited him to get pizza with us. Nobody cared that Lucas was gay.

Nobody cared? Of course somebody had to. What's going on? Was it really that easy? I wondered what they'd say if I told them I had a secret boyfriend too... But it was different for Lucas and Erich, right? As far as I knew, Erich didn't go to our school. If I revealed my boyfriend, would he be okay with it? How would the team react to me being gay too? And what about...?

"Aiden?"

I jumped up at the sound of my name, my ears almost flying off my head in fear. It was Ahmed, watching me carefully.

"Aiden, what're you still hiding for?"

"Sorry," I said. I couldn't bring myself to look into his eyes, his scowl. I knew what he meant and I didn't want to have this conversation. I noticed how quiet it was. "Did everyone already go?"

"Yeah," Ahmed said, "so I came to get you. I know what you're thinking."

"Ahmed, don't start."

"Why not?" Ahmed huffed. "I told you that they wouldn't care! And you just saw proof! Let's tell them."

"Ahmed--!"

"Why can't we tell them tonight? Lucas will be there with Erich! We won't have a better time to tell them!"

"Ahmed, we can't! I'm not ready!"

"Why?!"

"Because I'm terrified!" I was crying, I could feel it. I could feel myself on my feet and pacing. "How do you know that they're all okay with it? How do you know some of it isn't just an act? I promise you somebody's going to be squigged out or pissed off or something and it's only a matter of time before it comes back to bite them!"

"Aiden, please calm down," Ahmed was saying but I wasn't listening. I was worked into a tizzy and he knew it. I knew he knew it because he grabbed me, turned me around, and kissed me. Always shuts me up right away. "Okay, fine. Let's say you're right. But it's not just the team you're scared of, is it? That's such a small group. If they have a problem with it, then we'll quit. I'd rather be open than keep hiding in the closet. Hell, you're so far in the closet, you're in freaking Narnia."

"Coming out is brave but the closet is safe," I said. He rolled his eyes. He'd heard me say that so many times before.

"I get it. But just so you know, I don't want to wait forever," Ahmed warned me. "I love you but I have too much respect for my pride."

I rode with Ahmed to Mama Maria's in his pickup and for the first time ever, neither of us said a word. He had put on some music, some grunge band I'd never heard of, and I was positive he was furious. He was trying to hold it back and rein himself in before getting to the pizzeria. He wanted to fake like nothing was happening, to put on a show for the team.

Two years. It had been two years since our first kiss. Two years since we agreed to be exclusive. One year since we first said those three little words. A year and a half since we were intimate. And Ahmed never asked for anything. He was simplistic in his joys, never wanting extravagance or grand gestures. Just me. He only ever asked me one thing. My heart hurt as I mulled it over. I was weighing the pros and cons in my head and then it hit me. The biggest pro in my life was Ahmed. I was afraid but I had no doubt that he was too. But he was ready. He wanted to say something. Was it selfish to want to stay hidden, to keep up this facade?

We got to the restaurant and Ahmed said nothing to me as he opened my door and then held the door open for me to walk into the restaurant. The team was already raucous and enjoying themselves. And Erich, I noticed, fit right in as if he'd done this with us before.

If he was so readily accepted, they'd accept us too...

Right?

I should say this about myself, just in case you form any misunderstood opinions about me. Make no mistake, this lean Dalmatian loves his hyena lover. Ahmed and I have history spanning over a decade and at the time, I was afraid of what could happen. But I'm shy and reserved by temperament. I'm present but apart. A wallflower you'd only see if you knew what to look for. It's just my nature.

Ahmed has always been different. Strong and bold and brave. He knew fear, make no mistake, but fear never drove him. Fear was always the enemy he was overcoming. He went skydiving because he was afraid. He rode roller coasters with me because I was afraid.

And it was in the moment that we walked into the restaurant together that I was finally sick of it. Sick of being the coward. Sick of hiding behind a wall, behind excuses, behind Ahmed and my lies.

Face the facts, Aiden. You're gayer than a rainbow.

"Hey, bout time you guys got here!" Marky called. The cocky mouse was sitting right next to Erich and I was sure he'd been grilling the couple about their exploits. Marky, I remembered at that moment, was perhaps the most openly sexual person we knew. That mouse was a proud _pan_sexual. If the guys could accept him, why not us?

"Sorry, had to chew him about his lackluster performance today," Ahmed lied.

"Ooh, he really gave it to you, didn't he?" Marky said with a wince.

I have no idea why I said it. I doubt I even thought about saying it before the words tumbled out of my mouth in a chaotic mess of innuendo, love and lust. I grabbed Ahmed's paw in my own and leaned my head on his shoulder.

"You have no idea," I said in what I think was a seductive, teasing tone.

They looked at us in amazement but Ahmed was speechless. He gaped at my, open mouthed, as I leaned up and kissed his cheek.

"Close your mouth, sweetheart, you'll catch flies."

Ahmed's jaw snapped closed, but his eyes were as wide as ever. "You know what you just did?"

I nodded and my head felt heavy, but my shoulders felt weirdly light. Like I was floating. I pulled him closer, my body flush against his and kissed him on his lips. I could hear the team talking at the table, Marky cheering and clapping.

"Didn't think you swung that way, boss," Byron noted.

Ahmed pulled back. "You got a problem with that?"

Byron shook his head rapidly. "Congrats?" he offered shyly. "Swing for a different team but you still play ball, huh?"

The rest of the night passed in a blur. I was on cloud nine that night.

And I never came down.