FSE

Furry search engine

formerly SoFurry search engine

What had that creature done to me? Every spike down my back flexed upright. My limbs gave way an instant later, my mind sluggishly following. I felt like entering the dreamworld of sleep backwards, fighting my way upstream.

But is that where I was? A dream?

I was back in my settlement, just outside my old home. Packmates passed me without a single glance. Turning, I looked through the dried leaves marking the threshold of my door. No movement. The leaves grinded against each other noisily as I parted them with my muzzle, walking in. It looked like something had followed me into here from the waking world, an uninvited guest.

"You didn't have to surprise me with this, built creature. "

Its eyes grew brighter.

"Is that what you've been calling me?" it asked.

"What?" I said.

"Built creature."

"Well, yes."

"Fairly accurate I suppose. Especially since my true name is unpronounceable to you."

The heat on its face was surprisingly accurate. "You learned quickly," I said.

"Your mind is filling in the gaps. I'm hardly here at all."

"What do you mean?"

"This tool is complicated to say the least. It was designed to work on the species that created me. I was only just able to make it accept your biology instead."

The creature took a few steps closer. "I can't probe your memories. Only suggest."

"Probe my memories?" I asked.

"Where are we now?" it returned.

My eyes left the metal of the creature. Everything was just as I left it. My body-paint. My share of the hunting sled. My sleeping area. Even the drawings some daring youngsters left on my walls.

"I am home."

"Of course. A natural place to think of, especially after your banishment," it said.

"What? How could you know that?"

"Simple. I wasn't sure earlier, but when I saw how you made us hide from those hunters, only to call out the name of one of them, confirmed my suspicions."

I refused to talk about Rua. "I liked it better when you weren't so verbose," I quipped, grabbing a youngster's drawing off the wall. How did I remember what it looked like so accurately?

"A common reaction. I'm glad some of my attitude problems managed to make it through."

"Common?" I asked.

"You're far from the first creature I've had to work for the ability just to talk to."

"Tell me more about the tribe you come from," I requested.

"Not yet. Show me why you were banished first."

My heat went neutral. A reflex, done to hide any emphasis on my words. In my tribe, this was perfectly acceptable in large groups. But in private conversations like this one, it was very dangerous. Hopefully the creature wouldn't pick up on this inside my own head.

"Why?" I said placidly.

"I came to learn all that I can, but your story is especially interesting to me. All throughout H'Roh, I've been monitoring thousands of your kind. You are the only one I've spotted outside their tribe alone. You're quite exceptional."

Mulling over the words, I finally put back down the drawing in my paws. "It is not a story I tell readily."

"I'm not here to place blame, only learn," it tried to ease.

"If I do, you must promise me one thing."

"Yes?" it said.

"You must help me make it right."

The creature stared at me long and hard. "I can't promise something like that. I don't even know what you did."

"You can promise to help me try."

Another long stare. The lack of blinking was uncanny. "Okay. Show me how it happened."

"If this is a memory, how do I go to a different one?" I asked.

"You remember, of course. Try not to overthink it."

"Quiet."

Panic crept up and into my belly. "Where do I even start?"

"The beginning," it said.

"The beginning, right. You make that sound so simple."

Amber didn't have a response.

"Fine, let me think..." I started, "okay. Okay. You need a history lesson."

"What do you mean?"

I closed my eyes, and I thought hard. I thought of the unending days where the herds dried up, the growing hunger, the rising tensions. In my ears, I could hear Makur shouting over the pack. When I opened my eyes, I was deep in the crowd of packmates. All eyes were on him. Makur was challenging one of the Representatives.

"How can you possibly deny us meat when we were the ones to secure it to begin with?"

"You know our laws," the Rep Ka-sim said, "gorging yourself while Hunting is shameful!"

"You know nothing of shame," Makur spit. Makur was smaller than a typical adult H'Rah, but still his presence was imposing.

Ka-sim recoiled, her tail flicking. "If you have a complaint, Hunter, you can appeal with the rest of the Representatives."

At the word "Hunter," murmurs shook through the crowd. One voice cried out, their name lost to my memory.

"How dare you refer to Makur by that false title! If not for his skill, we would have all starved countless days ago!"

Another spoke. "If we let our emotions govern our actions like Makur, we are no better than the plant-eaters."

"We are no better than them," Makur spoke loudly, hushing the crowd. "Just as H'Rahs come from the ground of H'Roh, all other creatures come from H'Roh just the same. All that separates us is our passion. That is why we must give them a quick death after their capture."

Ka-sim spoke again. "You speak of passion and nature as though you aim to unite us, but all you and your band of rogues do is split us further. Your passion may yet be the death of us."

Makur stood high, his heat a full expression of his anger, but he remained quiet. He dropped down to four legs and walked off. A handful of his hunting party followed, and a curious few following them. On the other side of me, I finally noticed the built creature watching too.

"Ka-sim was wise. She could see the fissure forming," I said.

"Were you among the 'rogues,' as she called them?"

"No. You were correct though, strangely enough. After this, Makur took the rogue title in stride."

"They left your tribe?" it asked.

"Yes. More than a third of us. It was a sad day."

The crowd around us still gave us no mind, mostly dissolving now. Rep Ka-sim remained. A small group, including some other Representatives, spoke with Ka-sim in hushed voices. Their grief was obvious, only made more apparent by the hunger slowly eating through their bodies. I tried to listen in, but even close to them all I heard was quiet whispers. My memory didn't fill in this gap.

"What position does Ka-sim have in your tribe?" the built creature asked.

"She is a Representative, if that is what you are asking. All Reps have the same power. They make decisions by majority vote."

"Are they [...]?"

"What did you ask?"

"Are they [...]?" it repeated.

"That last word: I do not know it."

"How are Representatives chosen?" it tried again.

"They are not chosen," I said, "their ancestry gives them their power. Though, very rarely, some attempt to replace a Rep through mock combat."

"Fascinating. Why is that rare?"

"Because the Rep must agree to it. For a Rep to accept means the possibility of defeat and loss of service."

"Then why would they ever accept?"

"They would have a point to make."

The creature's short tail swayed side to side as it studied me. "Don't we all," it said.

I had not noticed it, but the public space we were standing in was now almost empty. The last packmate, Ka-sim, was frozen in place, then ceased to exist at all. My memory had evidently run its course.

"Well, will you show me now?" it questioned.

I was as still as Ka-sim was a moment ago. "This will not be easy to see."

"For me, or for you?"

Not replying, I closed my eyes again.

After Rogue Makur, and the forty-one who followed him, established their own tribe, tensions remained high. We occupied many the same hunting grounds. Fights broke out. Those first fights were not of claws and death, but of bloodless wrestling and general unwillingness. We were brothers and sisters, not distantly related tribes.

The scene came flooding in. Makur cried out to his packmates, calling them to action. We had both been hunting the same group of grazing Wahbih. Though Wahbih are poor in meat, those desperate Hunting days, there were fewer and fewer alternatives.

"Scare off these uncompassionate fools, Predators!" Makur screeched, "They no longer think of you as family!"

My Hunting group, running up to confront them, gave no cutting words in response. Though we numbered the same, nine to nine, our outward appearance could not differ more starkly. Our heat was calm and focused, theirs fiery with passion but lacking any form of empathy. They wore white war paint, various symbols of battle drawn on their chests and faces. Dust filled the air as we charged into them. Our heads knocked, pushing off of each other with all our strength. I remembered feeling the hot breath of my opponent against me, his facial heat even warmer. This was Huk. He was once a good friend, though then I had scarcely remembered it.

He was built larger than I, his spikes longer, but we were equalled in tenacity. When he was not able to overpower me from the initial push, he made the next move. Backing up faster than I could hope to lunge, Ruk launched up and attempted to take my balance from me with a heavy push at my forehead. I couldn't dodge completely. His paws connected on my shoulder, sending him spinning and throwing me onto my side. I stood, narrowly avoiding getting crushed by those fighting around me. Ruk got up before I could make an easy attack.

We faced each other, Ruk's face filled with anger. My heat flashed for a moment before I could suppress it. In response, his heat flashed amusement.

"Careful Ra-mank," he chided, "wouldn't want me to know you feel something in that head."

I growled. This was not the time for snide conversation. Next to me, my packmate was pinned under his opponent, his jaws around her upper neck to avoid the metal mane of spikes just below. She was not harmed, but our laws demanded that she forfeit her battle; her opponent had won. Thankfully, they did not help Ruk, instead deciding to help his packmate win a fight against two of my fellow tribe members.

I launched onto my two hind legs to get Ruk's attention by force. But he had the same idea. We met in the middle, our paws connecting. One of his paws leaked his amber blood onto mine. He must have torn himself on my neck spikes. I aimed to push his paws aside, leaving his flank open for a moment. Surprising at the time, I was able to overpower him. But he had wanted me to. Using his momentum, he spun all the way around. His flat-spiked tail whipped around. The instant before it connected, he rotated his tail to avoid slicing my side wide open. He still followed our laws.

This only served to knock air from my lungs, enraging me more. I couldn't accept I had left myself open to such an attack. Heat flaring again, I charged him on half a breath. Ruk was still slowing down from his spin; he wasn't able to fully meet me before my paws went crashing into him. We were both sent to the ground, adding even more dust to the already clouded air.

As I watched my past self engaged in combat, my breathing sputtered and stopped. The end was approaching all too soon.

My remembered body aimed to push up Ruk's jaws, allowing me to secure a grip on his neck and finally end this fight. His claws gripped my chest, preventing me from getting close enough. I was forced to back up slightly and get a better angle. He squirmed below me, putting all his strength into his two left paws. I was sent sideways but managed to stay off the ground. Before he could stand, I furiously launched myself on top of him again, any attempt to hide my heat gone.

Ruk was quick. His longer legs connected on my underside before I could reach him. He shoved me away--hard. I was sent rolling over the rocky ground. Out of breath, disoriented, and exhausted, I wasn't able to stop Ruk's advance. He got his jaws to my throat and firmly held them there. I was defeated.

As Ruk stood up over my weak body, my rage had nowhere to go. As he muttered something about my poor fighting technique, I lashed out. Long claws fully extended, I roared, swiping viciously at his unprotected face.

Ruk's cry tore through the battlefield. Packmates, fighting or defeated, one tribe or another, stopped to turn to us. No sounds except Ruk's were heard. Ruk was clutching his right eye in his paw, blood spilling down his neck. He fell to the ground, overcome in the horrible pain I conflicted.

Several of Makur's packmates went to Ruk's aid. No one gathered around me. Makur himself stared me down, giving me the most clearly defined heat of disbelief and anger I had ever seen. "There will be a price for this, Ra-mank," he promised.

The female packmate I had seen defeated whispered behind me. "How could you?" she said. Her voice was so full of hurt I didn't need to see her facial heat to read it.

Our Hunting leader spoke next. "Come, tribe. This battle is over. Ra-mank, you too."

We retreated from the scene, me most hesitantly. The combatants' heats all spoke revenge. When I finally returned to my own pack, their silent faces were no more welcoming.

Makur's tribe blinked from existence one-by-one. My tribe disappeared from view in some tall foliage. All that was left was the current me and the built creature. Throughout the course of the entire battle, it had not made a single sound, just watching what had occurred.

I swallowed my renewed shame for a moment. "I hope that satisfies you, built creature."

"Amber."

"What?" I said.

"My name is the color of your H'Rah blood. You can call me Amber."