Being Transgender

Story by makyo on SoFurry

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#8 of Poetry

Older drivel.


You get to explain gender to all of your friends --

And all of your family --

And maybe once more to be sure --

And random strangers --

And maybe, like, doctors and nurses who should probably know better;

You get to explain to your partner that nothing has changed --

And that you were always this way --

And that really, honestly, nothing has changed --

And that this has no effect on your love for them --

And I promise;

You will get to come out again --

And explain that it wasn't that being gay wasn't enough --

And explain that it has nothing to do with who you like --

And explain that that shouldn't matter --

And -- oh right, this means you might be straight after all;

You get to go through that awkward period of growing your hair out --

And learning how to ask for a more feminine haircut --

And trying a curling iron for the first time --

And figuring out how to eat noodles without also eating your hair --

And the worries that you're just trying to be rebellious;

You get to worry whether you're maybe just trying to be rebellious --

And whether or not you might just be faking it --

And whether you're really Trans Enough or not --

And whether you're maybe just appropriating femininity --

And whether or not passing really matters to you anyway;

You get to dress up in your best clothes --

And your best makeup --

And worry that your shoes are too masculine --

And have your hair game on point --

And convince the doc that you deserve those patches and pills;

You get to go through puberty again --

And it will be weirder this time around --

And your skin will grow soft --

And you'll get more sensitive to temperature changes --

And -- YEOWCH! That's a new sensation;

You will cry a lot --

And bite your tongue often --

And lower your gaze --

And learn to take up less space --

And talk softer;

And your dogs will still love you.

Meaning & Self

There's some duality between sources of meaning, Between the types of stories we use to back identity. It's not quite good & bad or light & dark, Though I'm not yet sure just how to define it. Dad used to punish the dogs by locking then in...

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There is too much fire in me

There is too much fire in me to be described by the soldering iron's tip. If I were to draw that across my flesh, it would all spill out at once. I'd melt, eaten whole by flames, and flow into a pool of molten silver. I would be borne up...

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When I fall, I will remain whole

I keep hoping that, one day, I'll spring palladial from the bole of a tree. Fully formed, sexless, Conceived without desire or intent. My body will be virginal and clean, My mind fresh, my soul at ease. The tree, behind me, will stand crooked,...

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